autismpop

I've found that over the past year or so that my wife and I have been growing more and more distant and that all our energies have been getting focused on our daughter, her programs, therapies, and planning.....we've tried to go out on "dates" - which are not so easy to plan for us right now - but then all we end up talking about are the same things we talk about at home. Would love to know other couples' strategies and what has worked before my wife and I just become two "therapists for our daughter" who just happen to live together...

Ros kapj

My Son is Nineteen we went through a rough patch and blamed each other in the beginning . We somehow focused on our common bond and great love for our Son. We realized that first there was our great love for each other which brought us all together. Try to focus on the goal you both share. Talk about all the good times you shared. Try to be positive. Remember they are sensitive to negative vibes.

I hope with all my heart this helps you.
Ros

cammigirl

I ran into a similar problem when our 12 year old was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome. My husband became what I later learned was depressed and all he did was go to work, come home and sleep. He was always tired and blamed it on his job. I actually got fed up enough at one point to toss him out. It took almost a year for him to come to terms with our son's diagnosis and get back to normal. We went through a bout with infidelity (on his part) as well because I was emotionally unavailable to him. I know it's hard, but hang in there. Keep trying, keep the communication lines open (very important), and try to be there for each other. A pattern will eventually emerge from the chaos. We're here as a group if you need us and feel free to contact me via private message if you need to.

islandergirl

If you have a strong bond, you should be able to conquer anything that comes your way. I just wish the bond would of been there with my first marriage to withstand that type of thing. Now with a new man in our lives, I feel that we can conquer anything that comes our way. I never felt this way with my 1st husband. He told me after 13 years of marriage that he had never been in love with me, even when he told me that he loved me all of the time. Then he started leading a secret type of a life, by seeing other women he met off of the internet.
He couldn't handle the disabilities of his own children. Very sad!!
Curt, my new man is more of a dad to them already than my ex ever was. He wants to do things with them and play and do things with them. He is the best thing that ever walked into our lives and I don't want to let him go!!! :)

Ros kapj

Hi Pam:
You bring tears of joy to my eyes.
You are a strong and capable Women. Things are going to work out for you an Curt.